The summer Lavender turned twelve, she was eager to dip her toes into the world of make-out sessions with her school crush and late-night misdeeds with her best friend in their raucous Newark, NJ neighborhood. Instead, her father had other plans...musical plans. He wanted to continue cultivating her gifted melodic mind and nudge her to begin preparing to apply to the local Arts Magnet High School.
Lavender suddenly finds herself cast into an unrecognizable and dispiriting world where she fights to maintain her sense of self, connection to her musical gifts, and footing inside her own family dynamics.
Years later, as a woman in her thirties who never reckoned with how much of herself she'd relinquished in her tumultuous adolescence, Lavender meets a younger man who reminds her of what she's lost...and what she's surrendered. Captivated by his charm, yet apprehensive of his interest, she's upended in unexpected ways. The mental health struggles she's managed to mildly overcome is ever present as ghosts from her past continuously appear. Love tries to find her as she finds herself.
Will she reemerge from it all with her full self: stable, whole, and accepting of the love she deserves?
Or will she fall back into the cycle of old habits and questionable choices that persisted and framed her reality for decades?
If you're looking for a coming of age story focused on self-acceptance, overcoming trauma, and letting go of the past to move forward to the future, then this is the book for you!