Society tells you self-control is great; it's a virtue. Yet, your success in managing emotions, getting the job done, getting accolades for being detail-oriented, planful, driven, etc. haven't led to success in your intimate relationships and in the bedroom.
You've been told how being naughty gets you into trouble and that you should live by the rules to be successful. So, you developed self-control. Too much self-control, however, wreaks havoc in areas where vulnerability is essential: intimate relationships and sex life.
Can you have too much self-control? You bet!
The Overcontrolled Temperament
Too much self-control, also known as the Overcontrolled Temperament, is characterized by the following core traits:
- Not being open to new, strange, and unexpected experiences; tendency to avoid uncertainty; being risk-averse; threat sensitivity and hypervigilance.
- Compulsive need for structure and order; hyperperfectionism; rigid rule-governed behavior; high moral certitude; the strong belief in what "should be, must be, has to be."
- Flat or neutral face; not easily excited; avoiding vulnerability; saying "fine" when things aren't fine; pride in having a "stable mood."
- Feeling alone and that nobody quite gets you or understands you; comparing yourself to others; feeling envious and bitter.
Commons Sexual Problems of Overcontrolled People: Are you experiencing low sexual desire, emotional distance from your partner, sexual performance anxiety, sexual perfectionism, anorgasmia, sexual dysfunction, or sexual pain disorders? Then you owe it to yourself to read Making Nice with Naughty.
Why? Because you're not alone. Millions, just like you, struggle with relaxing and being playful during sex. Naughty has gotten a bad rap and represents so much of what you've come to avoid: mystery, unpredictability, unfamiliarity, and uncertainty. Yet, these features are essential to acquiring a meaningful and fulfilling sex life.
Get Sage Advice From a Leading Sexologist. It's time to make nice with naughty! Integrating several innovative and effective psychotherapies, Dr. Thomas L. Murray, Jr. takes you on an eye-opening journey, using humor and directness, to help you get what you want: a more fulfilling sex life. Here's why you'll love this guide:
- Discover how too much self-control underlies many sexual and relationship problems
- Reconnect with your partner using the power of vulnerability
- Experience freedom from old patterns of thinking
- Change your relationship with anxiety and embrace uncertainty
- Reduce negative self-talk
- Develop psychological flexibility
- Apply new and powerful mindfulness techniques
- Transition from performance-based to pleasure-based sex
Are you ready?