Translating Aunt Edna

by Rhonda Telfer

WE LOVE OUR Aunt Edna. She’s kind and sweet, she brings us doughnuts, and her dog Webster knows cool tricks. But every time she visits, she announces, “It is my obligation to increase your vocabulary.” Translation: she always teaches us new words. Lots of them. When she arrives, she says, “It is time for a familial embrace!” Translation: a hug no matter what, even if she is wearing too much perfume and her buttons poke us in the eyes. When she makes lunch, she says things like, “The legumes are delectable.” Translation: the peas are good, so don’t hide any under your mashed potatoes. She doesn’t teach us manners, oh no. She teaches us to “avoid the social faux pas.” Translation: don’t embarrass her in public by burping on the…

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Spider Magazine Stories, Games, Activites And Puzzles For Children And Kids (Digital) - 1 Issue, February 2025

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